Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize