Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
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