I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
We need to get me chipped asap
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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