we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Fuck me I smell like cheese
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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