I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
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Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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