Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I've blown a few things in my day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
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