Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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