i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
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When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
We had sex on a dog bed..
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In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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