I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
