Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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