its not stalking. its research.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
