It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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