i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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