Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
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