She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
