bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
