Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
ttyl tear gas
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
You pole danced in your parka.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
