I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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