Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
