ya dads aren't the best wingmen
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
