Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
