He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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