mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
