okay pat passed out under dana's car
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Randomize