The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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