her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
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