This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
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