I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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