hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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