ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
