just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Randomize