all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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