just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
