let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
