love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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