There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize