glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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