So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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