Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
two words: eviction party
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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