That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
