how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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