we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
