So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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