So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
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