somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I've blown a few things in my day
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
What drink are we having for lunch?
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Randomize
