I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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