Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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