I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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