It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
where am i from again
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
This house was built for laser tag.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
