home. puking in laundry basket.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
